HERE'S a solution for anyone who can't stomach the fake jollity of the average office Christmas party – grab a ticket for the Goldie Lookin Chain Office Party at Exeter Phoenix tonight, where you can join in the festive mayhem even if you don't have a job.

"Not only do you get the chance to hear some great new tracks as well as some of the old classics, but you get to recreate the thrill of working in a corporate environment and going out for the annual Christmas do," promises Eggsy, a chief ringleader with the tongue-in-cheek hip-hop posse from Newport in Wales.

"I promise our night out will be better than going for a second-rate meal with people you don't really like.

"Why not bring your own photocopier, loosen your ties, take off your high heels to dance around your handbag, and prepare to drink mammoth amounts of booze, all in the name of a b****y good knees-up."

So, it's probably not a date for those with a delicate constitution.

Initially a novelty act, the GLC have managed to secure an enduring fanbase with on-going batches of irreverent songs, boasting clever, ridiculous and risque lyrics, and keen observations of the fundamentals of the average chav-and-bling lifestyle.

Examples are Your Missus Is A Nutter, You Knows I Loves You, Guns Don't Kill People, Rappers Do… and there are others with titles unprintable in a family newspaper.

Eggsy says they will have a Christmas tree and some lights, but no hip-hop versions of Silent Night or Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.

"Dress code is free range, like Berlin in the 1930s. You don't have to dress up smart – you can wear whatever you like and feel free to express yourself. I'm rather hoping some women will turn up in leather chaps," he muses.

The tour ends on December 22 with a final office party in Shrewsbury, where their last show was apparently the next biggest thing since the Stone Roses played in 1988. Eggsy then intends retiring to his living room at home in Newport and having a grumpy, unsociable Christmas.

"I won't want to see anyone really. I might pop out for an hour and see the family, but I'm looking to go into a deep, dark depression – as bad as when Arthur stole the Christmas club money on EastEnders," he claims.

It sounds like another one of those GLC tall stories.

The guys are looking forward to being back in Exeter.

"Last time we came we played at the Lemon Grove – it was rammed out and we had about 200 people invade the stage at the end of the show. The bouncer was terrified," Eggsy says. "They've got crazy ales and ciders there too."

Let that be a warning...

If you can't get to the show, there's an opportunity to join in the fun online by downloading the new Goldie Lookin Chain single, Everybody is a DJ (from their latest album Asbo4Life), after December 14, and using a simple online programme to remix and sell it in aid of a charity for the homeless.

The Musicshake remix application enables anyone who buys the single to make their own remix of the track, including adding vocals.

They will also be able to sell their own version of the track to friends and family through the Musicshake website, to benefit Shelter Cymru.

"It's our chosen charity, not only because they seem to be the only charity willing to work with us, but because they are running their The Time Is Now campaign to get derelict houses made habitable," explains Eggsy.

"Go on, give it a go and get involved."

Goldie Lookin Chain play at the Phoenix Arts Centre, Exeter, tonight. Box office: 01392 667080 or www.exeterboxoffice.com.